When my daughter was born, I had not been allowed to see her, so therefore I knew very little details about her (except the memories about her birth) - which were the facts that it was a girl, she was barely 5 lbs and had a hole in her heart at birth. My mother told me years later that she had gone to look at the baby and saw she had reddish-blond hair. I had been a member of ALMA from the time she was (18-21) and then gave up thinking that she was alive or/ever wanted to meet me as I'd never received any calls.

One day my youngest son gave me a call and said he thought he had located her on a web site and that all the data matched. My daughter had made her own website and had been trying to find me for the past five years. Since I had no internet service- I let him give out my phone number, and one day I got the call from her. The very first things she told me were "the name of the hospital where she was been born( which I remembered), the approx time("which matched" and I'll never forget), and the fact that she was born with a heart defect and had a hole in her heart." I felt as if my heart was in my throat, I went speechless, and broke out in tears sobbing. She was on the other end of the phone asking "Is it me, are you my mother?" We both knew it could NOT BE a coincidence, that a baby girl was born same time, same hospital, with a hole in her heart, and adopted out. She also told me she had reddish blonde hair, I knew it was her!!!!!!!!! She then asked more questions about our descriptions and everything matched us both. (ALMA notation: it’s so important to compare all background information - time of birth, hospital, birth weight, physical descriptions, etc.)

It was a moment that's hard to describe (you wait so many years, and then one day it happens, and you can hardly believe what you're hearing).

I was living in Montana and my daughter was living in Austin, Texas at the time- so she sent me a ticket to come down and visit her for five days. This photo above was taken of the two of us at that reunion. It is amazing how many things we share in common (which proves how much genetic traits are passed down, even when raised by different families.) For over 30 years I'd had thoughts that my daughter was either dead from a birth defect I had given her, -would grow up and NOT know she had a different mom, - or would hate me for giving her up (not knowing that I was forced to give her up for adoption to protect my family from the shame and embarrassment) and to offer her a chance at a better life (than a 16-year old kid could provide).All those things were irrelevant once we were united, and nothing about the past mattered anymore. All that remains is the joy in knowing that we've been fortunate enough to find each other, meet each other, and accept each other for the women we are now. Even though we were apart for over 30 years, that bond between mother and daughter, was like it had NEVER been broken. I guess sometimes our hearts just "never give up caring or hoping for that day when we'll be reunited."

Thank you for the opportunity to share our story. Toby - Birth Mother & Alma Member and & Tammi, Adoptee!